April Showers
by Daisy5
Summary: A stranger from Angels past brings the vampire and his seer together


Title: April Showers Author: Daisy Email:e.large@talk21.com Category: Romance Pairing:Cordelia/Angel Rating: Ummm PG? Feedback: The one shining light in my Angel & Cordyless life at the moment.....so yes please! Disclaimer: I own NOTHING! Joss and the girls and boys at ME own all. Im just playing with them for a little while is all. oh, Aprils mine tho. Distribution: Want, take, have, but be a peach and let me know. Note: Right, I posted this an age ago but I thought, what the heck, I'll post it again cos Im feelin brave. This is before little Connor burst on the scene, around the beginning of season 3. ........................................................... ..........  
  
"Cordelia!" Angel shouted as he ran after his dark haired seer into the lobby of the Hyperion. Cordelia stopped sharply and glared at the vampire.  
  
"What?!"  
  
"Look, I know you're angry...." Angel started.  
  
"Me?Angry?Why the hell would I be angry?" Cordelia said through gritted teeth.  
  
Tonight hadn't gone well. An earlier vision had led the Angel Investigations team to an abandoned warehouse down by the docks. It was going fine, Wesley hadn't been knocked out and they had dusted most of the vampire gang that Cordelia had seen in her vision. But things had gone belly up when Angel saw that Cordelia was struggling with a particularly viscous vampire, once Gunn had helped her, Angel angrily ordered Cordelia out of the warehouse.  
  
"Cordy..."Angel sighed as he rubbed is tired eyes.  
  
"Don't Cordy me Angel.You had no right to tell me to get out of there. I was doing fine! I can look after myself!" Cordelia argued.  
  
"That bastard had you in a corner! If it weren't for Gunn you'd be dead!."  
  
"Dammit Angel, Im not Buffy!"Cordelia shouted before thinking. Angel let out an unneeded breath at his best friends harsh words.  
  
"This isn't about Buffy" Angel said quietly.  
  
"Isn't it? Isn't it always about Buffy?" Cordelia whispered almost to herself.  
  
"What's that supposed to mean?" Angel bristled. He stared unrelentingly at Cordelia until she was forced to look away.  
  
"I....I m going to take a shower," Cordelia had to get away from him before she said something she really regretted. "maybe its best if I go stay with Wesley until they've finished redecorating my apartment, I think its clear that I've out stayed my welcome here."  
  
"No Cor, you can stay here for as long as you need. Please, don't go."Angel said trying not to sound too desperate. Without saying another word Cordelia headed upstairs to the bathroom leaving Angel alone with is thoughts.  
  
Shes going to leave me was the current one circling his brain. I've already lost one woman I loved, I can't lose Cordelia too Angel ran his hands through his hair and tried not to relive the last three months.  
  
Buffy's dead.  
  
He'd known even before Willow had told them. He knew just by looking at the red heads face. "She's dead Angel. Our girl is dead." Was all the beautiful witch could choke out.Wesley and Cordelia had gone back to Sunnydale with him for the funeral. It had been the hardest week in the whole of Angels 250 years. He knew Cordelia and Buffy hadn't been especially close but she still grieved for the death of the young slayer who had saved her life so many times. Even though the Scooby gang had done there best to make the Angels Investigation team feel as though they were still part of the group, everyone knew that they weren't. While Willow and Cordelia had stayed in touch regularly and had subsequently become good friends, so much had changed since Angel and Cordelia had left they knew they didn't belong there any more. United more than ever the three friends returned to LA, but Angel was still battling with his grief for his first love. The only thing that pulled him through was Cordelia. She was terrified that if he were left alone for more than half an hour he'd lose it and start terrorising the neighbourhood. But he didn't go postal, he would never lose himself like he did with Darla again, he would die before he put Cordelia through that. And so day by day the pain lessened with the help of his best friend, and she truly was his best friend now. He knew what she was thinking before she did. He hadn't been this close to anybody in years.  
  
But that had all ended three days ago.  
  
........................................................... .............  
  
"I shouldn't have said that about Buffy." Cordelia told herself as she stepped out of the shower and wiped the condensation off of the mirror she'd insisted Angel install. "Damn it Chase, pull yourself together. So he slept with Darla and didn't tell me, is it really any of my business?" She asked her reflection."And now I'm talking to myself, this is just wonderful, I'm losing my mind." Groaning she leaned her head against the mirror.  
  
"Why did I have to find out?Why did that freaking Barry Manilow wannabe have to go and tell me?"  
  
Three days ago while they were following some leads at Caritas, Lorne and Cordelia were talking about Angels return from the dark side and the death of Buffy Summers. She was only half listening to the host of the club as she watched Angel question some of the more shady locals. Lorne had her complete attention however when he said,  
  
"...and when tall, dark and undead got all groiny with that Darla chick, hell I thought we were all in for it..."  
  
Angel had had sex with Darla. stupid blonde hell bitch  
  
"Right Chase, go down there and confront him about it, and don't take any crap from him either." She rallied herself into action. now if I could just remember how my legs worked...  
  
........................................................... ..........................  
  
From his vantage point behind the desk in the lobby Angel watched his seer descend the stairs. She looks so tired. There's something wrong but she's do damn stubborn she won't tell me. I could strangle this girl sometimes. She's wearing my Boston sweatshirt again. I wish she wouldn't. It smells of cinnamon once she's worn it. It smells of her. Is she trying to drive me crazy? Angel realised he was staring at Cordelia, he'd caught himself doing that a lot recently.  
  
"Do you want me to make you something to eat?" Angel said to cover up the fact that he'd been ogling his best friend.  
  
"Um ....no thanks." She couldn't eat now if her life depended on it. A thick silence engulfed the room as neither knew what to say to the other. Angel wanted to ask her what he'd done wrong, why she'd been so distant with him lately. Cordelia wanted to scream at him, shake him, punch him. But mostly she wanted to kiss him. And that pissed her off. As Cordelia picked the invisible lint off Angels sweater Angel began to drum his fingers on the counter top.  
  
"I'm really sorry about tonight Cor, when I saw you were in trouble and I couldn't get to you I just freaked.Forgive me?"  
  
"Don't I always?But your not really sorry are you Angel?Ever since Buffy died you've been Mr way too over protective guy, and whilst that's sweet, in a big grr vampire way, lately its become a little..well a little suffocating."Cordelia said in a rush. Why am I saying this?I love that he's protective over me!  
  
"I'm tired of being your silly little side kick, tired of being the butt of Gunns jokes. Im tired of these freaking visions. And I can't be your Buffy substitute anymore. Its not fair on me." Cordelia carried on even though her heart was screaming shut up shut up shut up shut up.  
  
"Is that what you really think? That you're her substitute, my side kick?" Angel asked her in disbelief.  
  
"Well aren't I?"  
  
"NO!I thought we were friends Cordy, geez I thought you were my best friend. I never asked you to be anything but youreself.I never wanted you to be anyone but youreself."Angel implored.  
  
"If we are such good friends then why didn't you tell me about Darla?"Cordelia said barely out loud.  
  
"Darla? Cordelia what are you talking about?"A strong feeling of dread started to creep over Angel. Cordelia wrapped he arms around herself feeling suddenly very cold.  
  
"I know....I know about you and Darla.....I know that you, you slept with her."Cordelia forced out.  
  
"How did you....who told you?"Angel asked dumbly  
  
"Does it matter?! Angel how could you?! With her! How could you have risked your soul like that?" Cordelia could visibly see Angel closing himself off, building up the walls that she had spent the last three years trying to break down.  
  
"It has nothing to do with you." Angel growled as he stood up suddenly and walked over to the couch to pick up his leather jacket. Walking after him Cordelia grabbed his arm and forced him to look at her.  
  
"So all that you were saying about us being best friends, that was all bull shit!"  
  
"Cordelia, please just leave it, it was a mistake, I don't want to talk about it."  
  
"Well maybe I do."Cordelia refused to back down.  
  
"Cordelia let go of my arm."Angel warned her.  
  
"No."  
  
Neither of them were going to back down, Cordelia wanted to thrash this out here and now but Angel wanted to forget it ever happened. Tension zipped around the room like fork lightening. The scent of Cordelias freshly washed hair made the demon stir inside of Angel.  
  
You want her.Take her.It whispered inside his brain.  
  
Ok my first mistake was touching his arm,Cordelia said to herself.now I cant let go of it.  
  
  
  
"Angel.....why didnt you tell me."Cordelia whispered.  
  
"I just....I couldn't."Angel whispered back. She was standing too close to him, he couldn't think straight when they were this near. Angel touched the side of her face, a cool shiver rippled down Cordelia's spine. The sound of the door opening forced the pair to look away from each other.  
  
"That big sign out side saying we are closed, well funny thing is it means we are closed." Cordelia shouted impatiently at the woman who was standing in the door way.  
  
"April?" Angel called out to the dark haired stranger.  
  
"Hey kid. Long time no see." The woman smiled at Angel. Then the vampire did something Cordelia had never seen him do in the six years she had known him. He ran up to the beautiful stranger and hugged her with such force that it lifted her off her feet.  
  
"God I've missed you." The woman smiled as she wrapped her arms around Angel.  
  
........................................................... .....................................  
  
Cordelia stood with her arms folded across her chest as she listened to Angel and April talk in the kitchen. Well this is just perfect. She thought to herself angrily. How many more women from Angels past are going to turn up? And why the hell am I standing out here? We were in the middle of something out there, if he thinks I'm just going to forget about it he's very much mistaken. Cordelia calmly walked in to the kitchen and sat down at the table with the pair. She didn't take her eyes off of Angel as she did so but he refused to look at her at all.  
  
"Angel, aren't you going to introduce us?" Cordelia said as she glared at the vampire.  
  
"Um, yeah, right. Cordelia this is April, April - Cordelia." April rolled her eyes at Angel's pitiful introduction.  
  
"I see your people skills haven't improved much. I'm an old friend of Angel's." Cordelia took the woman's hand and shook it. "It's nice to meet you."  
  
"Yeah well I wish I could say the same."Cordelia replied with barely restrained hostility.  
  
"Ooh catty, this one's a keeper Angel." April laughed as she sat back in her chair and passed Cordelia a beer.  
  
"So how long have you known Angel?" Cordelia asked enjoying how uncomfortable Angel looked.  
  
"Oh quite a while."April smiled fondly at Angel who couldn't help but smile back.  
  
"You haven't changed at all April, still as beautiful as the day we met."  
  
"Im well preserved."April smiled wryly. Cordelia began to grind her teeth together as she looked at April properly for the first time since she walked in to their office. April was beautiful.damn Her long black hair, exotic green eyes and pale skin were mesmerising.  
  
Pale skin?  
  
"Are you a vampire?" Cordelia blurted out.  
  
oops  
  
But April didn't even flinch at Cordelias question. It was Angel's turn to glare at Cordelia now and her turn to refuse to look at him. "It depends on what your definition of a vampire is." April told the young seer.  
  
"April is a friend Cordelia, you don't need to be worried. Ive known her for a long time, she's not evil, well not in the traditional sense anyway."Angel said to calm Cordelia. April clipped Angel round the head for the evil comment making the Angel chuckle.  
  
"What like Darla was a friend, like she wasn't evil?" Cordelia broke the light hearted mood.  
  
"Cordy, not now....."Angel sighed.  
  
"Why not now, don't you want April to know about her, doesn't she know about your old mate Darla? Afraid she might think less of you?" Cordelia snapped.  
  
"Whoa kids, what's with all the stress round here?" April spoke up to break the tension.I thought I'd interrupted something when I came in, there was a serious amount of electricity between them earlier.April silently said to herself. "Whats going on. I thought you'd killed that cow years ago."April asked her dear friend.  
  
"I did. She came back." Angel mumbled as he stared at his beer.  
  
"Damn." April slumped into her chair. " You know Darla?" Cordelia couldn't help but ask.  
  
"Oh hell yeah, from way back in the day. And now she's back huh? I never could stand her."  
  
"You're not the only one."Cordelia agreed with April.  
  
"I take it you're not a fan of hers then."  
  
"You could say that."Cordelia said looking at Angel who was still enthralled with his beer.  
  
"Change of topic I think."Angel said suddenly. "So what brings you to town then?" Aprils countenance changed dramatically as she turned all her attention toward Angel.  
  
"I heard about the Slayer. Im really sorry honey."April covered his hand with her own.  
  
"Thanks for coming." Angel squeezed her hand affectionately. "How did you find out?" "Spike told me, I went to see him last week, he's a real mess Angel."  
  
Xander had told them that Spike had taken Buffy's death particularly badly but Angel and Cordelia weren't convinced. When Willow had told him that Spike was in love with Buffy and had sworn to protect her sister Dawn, Angel had refused to believe it.  
  
"You should ring him." Angel knew that was more of an order than friendly advice.  
  
"April I know you and Spike still have a ....a close relationship and you refuse to see the evil in him but I do. He's not good. The last time I saw him he was running hot pokers through me. Some government chip might mean he can't kill but it doesn't mean that he doesn't want to. He hasn't really changed, he won't change, he's a vampire."  
  
"Oh yeah I forgot, vampire automatically equals evil. Jesus you should know better than that. I'm not having this argument with you again Angel, Im too old for that shit now. All I'm saying is that he could use some one to talk to, someone that knows what he's going through." The lobby telephone began to ring, Angel waited for Cordelia to go answer it but there was no way she was going to move just when the conversation was getting interesting.  
  
"Delia..." Angel nodded his head towards the lobby.  
  
"Im off the clock, its your phone, you answer it."  
  
"Fine." Angel growled, "Damn women." April heard him mutter under his breath as he went to answer the phone.  
  
The two women sat in awkward silence.  
  
"He never told you about me did he?" April asked Cordelia.  
  
"No, there seems to be a lot of things he doesn't tell me." Cordelia replied frostily.  
  
"Well he told me about you. Infact his letters are full of little else but you."April smiled knowingly at Cordelia. "But...he never said you two were in love."  
  
"We're not in love!"Cordelia blushed at the woman's words. "We're friends, we work together, that's all." Once again silence filled the kitchen. They could hear Angel talking on the phone in the lobby.  
  
"Were you and Angel ever....?" Cordelia trailed off clumsily. April leant closer to Cordelia but hesitated in answering, finally she said, "Yes and no."  
  
"Oh...huh?" Cordelia was confused.  
  
"I have to go over to Wes'." Angel interrupted the two women. "He's found some moth bitten prophecy. Are you two coming?"  
  
"No!" Cordelia shouted before April had a chance to answer. "Don't worry I'll look after April." Cordelia said giving him a saccharin sweet smile. I probably shouldn't leave these two alone together, they'll either kill each other or worse, they'll become friends and talk. About me.  
  
"Ooookay, I shouldn't be too long."  
  
"Fine." Cordelia dismissed him, but Angel didn't move.  
  
"We'll be fine Angel .Go. Translate musty Latin prophecies." April reassured him.  
  
"Right....right, I'll.. um....right....bye."Angel continued to look worriedly at Cordelia then quickly hurried out of the room.  
  
"You make him nervous." April told Cordelia  
  
"I know." Cordelia smiled and couldn't help but laugh.  
  
........................................................... ...........................  
  
"So you and Angel.....wots up with that?" Cordelia started to relax after her third glass of wine. "When did you two meet?"  
  
"When I first met Angel he was Angelus."April said seriously.  
  
"I don't have to imagine how fun that wasn't" Cordelia shivered at the memory of Angels alter ego.  
  
"Well....actually..."April smiled.  
  
"Hold on a second, you and Angelus!?! You had a thing with that bastard!" Cordelia couldn't believe what she was hearing.  
  
"See this is the mistake everyone makes. There was more to Angelus than just his homicidal ways. He had his moments Cordelia, its not like he was killing people 24 hours a day, what do you think they do during the day? Sit around and compare knitting patterns?"  
  
"I thought....hell I don't know what I thought. But April, weren't you scared of him?"Cordelia asked intrigued. "Of course I was, I tried to kill him six times......ah memories."April stretched lazily.  
  
"I am sooo confused."Cordelia drained her glass then refilled it.  
  
"Ok I'll break it down for ya hun. I was born in1655, my mother was a slayer, my dad was a vampire. Don't ask me how I happened, the powers that be never let me in on that one."  
  
"You gotta love those PTB!" Cordelia toasted with her glass of wine.  
  
"Indeed. Anyway, I'm this messed up mix of slayer and vampire. I'm not gonna get called as a slayer and I don't drink blood. I think I'm pretty much immortal, I've been shot, stabbed, hung and drowned. Not fun. I digress, when I met Angelus and Spike they were working their way through Italy at the time, sampling the, um, locals."April cringed.  
  
"Oh no, they weren't homicidal at all." Cordelia drawled sarcastically.  
  
"Will you let me finish? I was probably about your age, it wasn't long after my ma told me exactly what I was and what she thought I should do with my life .I didn't want to fight demons for eternity, I wanted to be a dancer!" April exclaimed.  
  
"Some one has issues with her parents..."Cordelia interrupted.  
  
"Damn right I do. Stop butting in, you might learn something. I was a wench in one of the taverns Angelus and Spike use to haunt, I was the only girl that had the balls to go and serve them. Angelus use to stare at me constantly, really use to freak me out. Long story short I was walking back to my apartment one night when he rushed me from behind and drained me before I could even blink, he broke my neck for good measure then stalked off. I tell ya I had one hell of a headache in the morning, and they didn't have Advil back in those days. Anyway I was highly annoyed that he thought he could just kill me like that and not give me a chance to beat the crap out of him. So a few days later I found out where he was living and went there during the day, I swear I had every intention to kill him, but when I saw him....i just....i mean the man is so fine!" April said by way off explanation. Cordelia laughed at the misty look on her face.  
  
"So you didn't get you're revenge then?"  
  
"Of course I did! Ever see that scar on Angels back? That was me."April said proudly. "I broke his jaw, dislocated both his knees and his left shoulder." April chuckled.  
  
"You are one scary woman. But I still don't get how you and Angel had a thing."  
  
"Angelus, not Angel. He was lying on the floor all bloody and pathetic, and I ended up feeling sorry for him, you know that puppy dog look Angel gets sometimes, well that's an Angelus trade mark. You were right when you said he was a bastard though, but for a little while he was my bastard. It didn't last for long," April sighed. "Darla was getting restless so they left Italy. I ran into him in Romania, just before the infamous episode with the gypsies, but then he disappeared off the face of the earth when he was cursed." April finished.  
  
"Was that the last time you saw him?" Cordelia said gripped by the woman's story.  
  
"No, I moved to the U.S in the 50's, he stayed with me for a while but the fact that we had seen each other all kinds of naked made it sort of awkward, so he disappeared again, the guilt was really kicking in by then. Then a few years ago, I guess it must have been around the time he met Whistler, I got a letter from him and we kept in touch from then on, he rings me every other week to see if I'm still on the straight and narrow but I hadn't heard from him for a while, I take it Darla turning up must have thrown him abit."  
  
"Yeah, just a bit."Cordelia mumbled. "I can't believe he never told me about you, that is so typical of him."  
  
"So what was all the tension about when I came in, I thought you were going to rip his head off earlier?" Cordelia scrunched her face up at Aprils question, she really didn't want to talk about that now.  
  
"Oh nothing, just a rough night is all."April knew she was lying but decided to let it go anyway. this girl is a one big bundle of confusion, she obviously loves him but she's mad as hell about something.  
  
"So, what did Angel mean when he said you and Spike had a close relationship." Cordelia asked to change the subject.  
  
"Oh Spike, now I could have loved him. He's like a big kitten really and seriously ticklish for a dead guy."  
  
"We are talking about the same Spike aren't we? Tall, blonde, questionable English accent?" April laughed at the seers description of her old friend.  
  
"Yep that's him. You've been taught to hate vampires, stake first ask questions later right? Well I'm half vampire, I see things in a different way. You see Spike as a viscous killer, I see him as a dear old friend that I love. Angels a vampire and yet you care for him."April was careful not to use the 'L' word.  
  
"That's different, he has a soul."Cordelia said defensively.  
  
"But he's still a vampire, still a demon."April argued back.  
  
"It's not the same."Cordelia ended any further comment on the topic.  
  
"Well I guess we'll have to agree to disagree then....Hey did Angel ever tell you why Spike is called Spike?" April said to lighten the mood.  
  
"Umm, isn't it something to do with rail road spikes?"  
  
"Hell no..."April whispered the real reason in her ear. Cordelia could feel herself blushing.  
  
"Get out! That's huge." The young girl exclaimed.  
  
"Uh huh."  
  
"Wow."  
  
"Yep, he can do things that would make a girls head spin....and as for Angel....."  
  
.......................................................... ............... "I said you should have told her about you and Darla." Wesley admonished Angel. They had given up trying to translate the prophecy half an hour ago after they realised it had already been thwarted years past. So instead Angel was putting off going home by picking Wesley's brain about the "Cordelia Problem".  
  
"I told you so's don't really help me at the moment Wes. I was going to tell her when the time was right...."  
  
"We both know the time was never going to be right. You had no intention of telling her, if you did you would have told her when you told me....hang on a minute, you didn't say I already knew did you?" Wesley asked anxiously.  
  
"Don't worry, I didn't, I'm the only one Cordelia's mad at."  
  
"That's a relief, the wrath of Cordelia is something I can do without." The ex-watcher said relieved.  
  
"And now Aprils in town, don't misunderstand me, I love that woman dearly, but she does like to talk. I can only imagine what she'd telling Delia."Angel whined. "So why are you still here? Angel you're a 200 plus year old vampire, you've seen a lot worse things than Cordelia Chase angry.....but then again." Wesley chuckled.  
  
"You're still not helping."  
  
"I'm sorry Angel, well at least you know why she's been acting so weird lately." Wesley tried to see the brighter side of things. Angel scowled at the English man.  
  
"If I were you I'd go back there and beg for her forgiveness, you might want to pick up a box of chocolates on the way there too.Or possibly buy her a new pair of shoes."  
  
"I really can't see how this is any of her business anyway."Angel grumbled as he got up to leave.  
  
"Of course it's her business, she's in love with you." Wesley muttered.  
  
"What?" Angel's heart would have skipped a beat if it were beating.  
  
"Oh, um, nothing. It's late, I'm tired, talking nonsense." Wesley hurried the vampire out of the door.  
  
"Wesley did you say ..." Wesley shut the door in Angels face before he could finish the question.  
  
.......................................................... ............................ By the time Angel had got back to the hotel the lights were off and Cordelia had gone to bed. Oddly tired Angel climbed the stairs to his room, Wesley's almost indiscernible words fluttering around his head. Maybe I heard him wrong. Angel tried reason with himself. Turning on the small lamp in his room Angel picked up a note from his dresser.It read:  
  
Hey Chuckles, I've gone back to my place hun, I had some things to  
  
finish up. I put Cordelia to bed, I think she had too much wine. Sorry.  
  
I didn't mean to get your girl drunk.  
  
I think it's about time you and me had a chat about a few things.  
  
See you in the morning dear heart.  
  
April xxxxx  
  
"I wish she wouldn't call me chuckles.........."  
  
........................................................... .................... "Sail away with me honey, put your heart in my hands..." Angel sang along with the radio badly. He was unusually cheerful this morning, instead of the usual dread of the day ahead Angel woke up with a strange feeling of glee. And it has nothing to do with Wesley telling me Cordelia was in love with me. He tried to convince himself.  
  
"Sail away with me.....what will be will beeee....i wanna hold you now....."Angel continued to massacre the song loudly.  
  
"I swear man, you keep singing and I'm gonna stake you dead." Gunn threatened him. The young black man sat with his feet up on the kitchen table as he flicked through one of Wesley's threadbare antique monster books. "Yeesh" Gunn recoiled as he came across an especially ugly demon.  
  
"That's a Klak Naa, not as nasty as it looks." Angel said as he looked over Gunn's shoulder. He closed the book with a loud thump and threw it on to the table.  
  
"Man I'm bored," Gunn complained. "Hey Wes, you wanna go play a game of basketball?" He called to the ex watcher in the lobby.  
  
"Gunn we have far too much work to do, and you're meant to be helping me not just sitting around twiddling your thumbs." Wesley called back disapprovingly.  
  
"Is it me or is the stick up English's arse getting bigger?" Gunn asked Angel.  
  
"I heard that." Clucked Wesley as he walked into the kitchen.  
  
"You know your starting to sound a lot like Giles." Angel warned him light-heartedly.  
  
"So very very British." Gunn said in his best British accent.  
  
"That was terrible." Angel laughed as he poured three cups of coffee then put them on the table.  
  
"I do not sound like that!" Wesley said outraged.  
  
"Dude, you really do."  
  
"Uh huh."Angel agreed with Gunn.  
  
"Will. You. All. Please. Be. Quiet !!" Cordelia hissed from the door way.  
  
"Hey Barbie's up!" Gunn said happily as she slumped in to the fourth chair round the table.  
  
"If you shout again I'm gonna pull out your rib cage through your nose." Cordelia threatened him.  
  
"Cordelia are you ok?" Wesley asked concerned, Cordelia dropped her head on to the table top and covered it with her arms, mumbling something unintelligible. Angel poured her a large glass of orange juice and opened the aspirin bottled for her.  
  
"What did she say?" Wesley asked Angel. "Her exact words were, 'red wine bad, give me vitamin c, I hate you all'. I'm fluent in Cordy speak." Angel grinned proudly.  
  
"You forgot the bit where I said I hated you the most." Cordelia said to Angel caustically.  
  
"I figured the guys didn't need to know that." Angel muttered feeling his good mood slipping away, in his cheerfulness he'd forgotten that Cordelia was mad at him.  
  
"Gunn, I think I will take you up on that game." Wesley said quickly.  
  
"Cool." Gunn said oblivious to the way Cordelia was scowling at Angel. "Angel, we'd ask you to come too if it weren't for the fact that you'd burst into flames as soon as you stepped out side." Gunn said as they headed out the door.  
  
"That starting to sound quite appealing...." Angel grumbled as he watched the two men walk off leaving him alone with a hung over and pissed off Cordelia Chase.  
  
"Well I guess we'd better talk about Darla." Angel ventured.  
  
"You know what Angel? I really don't care about that anymore," She sighed "talking to April last night opened my eyes to a few things. She knows so much about you, so many personal things you never thought to tell me. I know why you didn't tell me, its the same reason you didn't tell me about April, or your days as Angelus, or why Spike calls you Peaches. You don't trust me with these personal things. You still see me as bitchy little Queen C, just a stupid little girl. I'm sorry I'm not strong and fast like Buffy or dead like Darla, I'm just a regular girl. I guess I'm not interesting enough to mean anything to you. " Cordelia said holding back tears.  
  
"That's not it at all...."  
  
"Yes it is Angel! As soon as that undead bitch was back on the scene you forgot all about me and the guys, like the last year meant nothing to you. You thought so little of us and yet I trusted you. God I told you everything about myself, I trusted you enough to tell you about me and Xander, I've never told anyone about how much I loved him! I even told you about my stupid drunken mother...... But you've never really let me in. You've always kept yourself at a distance. Do I mean that little to you? You're my best friend, but right it's like I don't know you at all." Cordelia got up to leave but was stopped by Angel's firm grip on her arm. He gently pulled on it making her sit down again.  
  
"Are you finished? Firstly I didn't tell you what I did with Darla because I didn't want you to hate me, but that one seems to have backfired. I was in a real bad place when I slept with Darla, I would never have done anything so stupid if I were playing with a full deck. Secondly, I trust you more than I have trusted any one in the whole of my long sad life and yes that includes Buffy. I don't know why I didn't tell you about April, maybe I was scared you'd meet and she'd tell you things that I'm not exactly proud of and you'd think even less of me. Thirdly, Cordelia, sometimes it feels as though you are my whole world...and I like that." Angel laced his finger through Cordelia's.  
  
"And you are not a stupid little girl. You are the most amazing, beautiful, intelligent, funny, wise woman I have ever known. I'm sorry for everything I have done and said to make you hate me so much Cordy. Please don't leave me, you have to forgive me." Angel begged.  
  
"I, I don't think I've ever heard you say so much." Was all Cordelia could manage to say. Angel smiled softly, a little embarrassed at the way he had gushed on.  
  
"I've been saving it up for quite a while." Cordelia swallowed down two aspirin and the glass of orange juice Angel had poured for her earlier.  
  
"How are you feeling?" He asked her tentatively.  
  
"Better, a little fuzzy but better."  
  
"Good." They sat in comfortable silence for a few moments. The awkwardness of the last few days had vanished. He said I was the most amazing, beautiful, intelligent, wise woman he'd ever met. Oh my. Cordelia felt giddy.How am I meant to stay mad at him when he says stuff like that?  
  
Please say something please say something please say something. Was all Angel could think.  
  
"I'm not going to leave you Angel and I don't hate you." Cordelia finally said after she'd given Angel enough time to sweat. "I don't think I could ever hate you Angel. I love you too much... As a friend, I love you as a friend." Cordelia said hurriedly to cover her slip. She could feel herself starting to blush.  
  
"I love you too." Angel smiled at his seer.  
  
"As a friend." Cordelia finished for him.  
  
"But you did lie to me about sleeping with Darla, I hate being lied to Angel, you know that."  
  
"I'm sorry Cordelia." Angel lamented once again.  
  
"Ok, just don't bloody well do it again. And I'm still mad at you. But not as mad as I was." She said truthfully. "If you don't do anything in the next twenty four hours to piss me off I think we'll be ok."  
  
"I"ll try my best." He grinned stupidly at her. When did he become so goofy? He was never like this in Sunnydale. He's so much more....well, at ease with himself now.  
  
"So, April told you why Spike calls me peaches huh?"  
  
"Yep, I may never eat fruit again now. I like April, she's interesting, a little frightening, but interesting all the same."  
  
"What exactly did she tell you?" Angel asked apprehensively.  
  
"Enough so Cordelia has a good hold over you." April said from behind them.  
  
"Very stealthy." Cordelia said impressed.  
  
"Your looking a little worse for wear this morning hun, I told you not to have that last bottle of red."  
  
"You had as much a I did, why don't you look like the exorcist girl too?" Cordelia asked the unnaturally entrancing woman.  
  
"Not entirely human remember?" April said by way of an explanation.  
  
"I don't get hangovers, one of the perks of being a freak."  
  
"Lucky cow." Cordelia grunted, "I need a bath, for an hour or two....will you be around for a while today? I'm thinking shopping might help the knewmatic drill in my head."  
  
"Sure babe, shopping sounds great." April said happily.  
  
"Ok then...um Angel...can I have a quick word with you in the hall." Cordelia motioned the vampire out of the room.  
  
"What's .....?" Angel began. Cordelia enveloped the vampire in a hug that took Angel by surprise. He wrapped his arms around her slender body and inhaled the scent of her hair. Just as he was settling in to it and enjoying the feeling of having Cordelia pressed up against him she pulled away. "What was that for?" Angel asked her slightly bemused.  
  
"No reason." Cordelia said as she made her way up the stairs.  
  
........................................................... .....................  
  
"So that's why Angel was singing like a school girl this morning. It all makes sense now." Gunn finally understood. The two friends sat in the park not far from the hotel, Wesley had filled him in on the reasons behind Cordelia's bad mood and Angel's giddiness.  
  
"How did you know she was in love with him? Did she tell you?"  
  
"Well, no, not exactly." Wesley grimaced. "It was more of a hunch, I didn't even mean to say it out loud."  
  
"Nice one English."  
  
"It's so obvious though! It's not my fault they're both too blind to see it." Wesley grumbled.  
  
.......................................................... ......................  
  
Angel couldn't stop smiling. Cordelia hugged me. She's not leaving me. Cordelia hugged me.  
  
"Earth to Angel, anyone in there?" April tapped her friend on the head. "You've been standing out here for about five minutes now, what's so interesting?" April looked up and down the hall.  
  
"I, um, hi!" Angel brought himself out of his happy revelry.  
  
"Hi." April laughed at him. "Things seem a little better round here today. I take it you begged for forgiveness for your little Darla trauma?"  
  
"She told you about that then?" Angel asked her hesitantly.  
  
"Yep. You can be a real dumb arse sometimes Angel." She clipped him round the head like a disapproving sister. "You should be grateful that I've decided not to stake you myself. You nearly mucked that one up big time." April lectured him. "Cordelia is a keeper. If you had any sense at all you'd be up there in the bath with her."  
  
"Cordelia's just a friend April." Angel said not even convincing himself any more.  
  
"Yeah, sure, if you say so." April humoured him.  
  
"It's true."  
  
"uh huh."  
  
"It is!"  
  
"If that's what you choose to believe...."  
  
"You're infuriating." Angel huffed as he trailed after her down the hall. "And your in love with your seer." April teased him.  
  
"What are the odds of you letting this go?"  
  
"Slim to none."  
  
"I thought so."  
  
........................................................... ........................  
  
"Buy her flowers." April grunted as she pummelled the punch bag Angel was barely holding steady for her.  
  
"What?"  
  
"Flowers. Get Cordelia flowers. Trust me Angel, I may be 346 years old but I'm still a woman, start with flower's, then dinner, jewellery's always nice." April took a break much to Angel's relief, he had forgotten just how strong this girl was. "I am not going to ask Cordelia out on a date April." Angel told her in his best 'this isn't up for discussion' voice.  
  
"Why the hell not?" April stretched her arms up in the air then slid effortlessly into a handstand. Closing her eyes she raised her left hand off the ground and lowered her right leg at a right angle to her body. Angel sat down on the mat next to her and watched her in awe.  
  
"How do you do that?"  
  
"Don't change the subject." April said without breaking her concentration. "Why can't you admit that you love her?"  
  
"Fine."Angel gave in with a sigh. "Maybe I do have feelings for Delia."  
  
"Finally!" April flipped to the ground gracefully. "So what are you going to do about these feelings."  
  
"I figured I'd just ignore and repress them until they go away."  
  
"Wrong answer."  
  
"What else can I do? Even if she feel's the same way about me we could never be together properly. It didn't work with Buffy so how is it gonna work with Cordelia? She deserves more than me." Angel brooded.  
  
"Oh get over yourself Angel." April snapped at her friend. "Buffy was the slayer, that wasn't going to work no matter what. My mum and dad had the same problems, they were each others natural enemies, they loved each other but it was just wrong. And as for you're freakin curse, have you spoken to the powers that be about it? They might be gallactically stupid about most things but I'm sure they don't want Angelus running around causing mayhem again......although I wouldn't mind seeing him for a couple hours." April said smiling wickedly at Angel, he would have blushed if he wasn't dead.  
  
"Do you really miss Angelus?"  
  
"Your changing the subject again Angel. Not an attractive quality in a vampire."  
  
"No, I really want to know." Angel said seriously. April shifted uneasily, they had never really spoken about her relationship with Angelus.  
  
"Sometimes I miss him, we had some good times." April smiled faintly. "I know you did April, I have his memories remember?" Angel squeezed her hand affectionately. "Although I really could do without some of them. You two had a......graphic sex life." Angel grinned saucily this time making April blush.  
  
"But I think I like this version of you the most, I've seen you evil, guilt ridden and uber broody. This is much better. Less broody more smiley. Cordelia's good for you. Don't let this one slip by."  
  
"How on earth am I meant to make a move on my best friend? What if Wesley was wrong about the way she feels about me? What if I tell her how I feel and she just laughs in my face? What if she tells me she just sees me as a friend, or worse, like a brother? Uh huh, I don't think so." Angel shook his head.  
  
"Well you won't know until you try. Stop being so pathetic and do something!"  
  
........................................................... ...............  
  
Three hours later Angel was on the phone to the florist, trying to order two dozen red roses for Cordelia, while Wesley and Gunn laughed at his growing annoyance at the girl on the other end of the line.  
  
"No, that's my name, Angel....A-N-G-E-L.....yes like the thing with wings.....thank you ma'am it is very pretty.......a message? Um, put 'Delia thank you for being my friend'.....well I happen to think that's very sweet....fine how about 'Delia you are my everything'.......well I'm glad you approve........to the Hyperion Hotel.....yes that's the one.....yes I'm sure I want roses....i really don't think that's any of your business.......I'm not being snappish.......I'm sorry ma'am........ok....... thank you." Angel finally hung up.  
  
"You couldn't buy entertainment like that." Gunn laughed. "She told me off for being snappish, I'm a 250 year old vampire and a florist I have never met told me off for being snappish!" Angel said astonished.  
  
"You did growl at her Angel, people don't like it when they're growled at." Wesley chuckled at his friends expense.  
  
"So you've decided to go with flowers to win over Miss Chase then?" Gunn said only to be kicked under the desk by Wesley. "What?!"  
  
"Um, yeah, April suggested it." Angel mumbled awkwardly. "Do you think she'll like them?" He added anxiously.  
  
"She'll love them Angel." Wesley reassured the vampire. "Wesley...I've been wondering about what you said last night about Cordy...about how she feels about me....was that.....did she tell you that?" Angel stumbled.  
  
"Well no not exactly." Wesley grimaced.  
  
"Oh." Angel said dejectedly. He slumped morosely in to his chair, getting ready to brood big time.  
  
"For gods sake Angel, it's so bloody obvious!" Wesley shouted making Angel and Gunn jump. "Why do you think she got so upset about Darla? Wake up man, the woman is in love with you, she might not want to admit it yet but she is!" Wesley finished surprised at his outburst.  
  
"I think the real question is how do you feel about her? Because if this is just a whim we'll tear you into little pieces." Gunn told him seriously.  
  
"This isn't a whim, I love her. I'm in love with Cordelia Chase. There I said it. I'm in love with Cordelia Chase!" Angel shouted happily.  
  
"We really should get that bell fixed." Cordelia said making all three men spin around suddenly. "I'll, um, I'll just put these bags away." She gestured to her shopping then hurried upstairs.  
  
"How long have you two been standing there?" Angel asked April who was leaning against the door frame.  
  
"Long enough."  
  
........................................................... .......................  
  
"Cordelia? Cordy?" Angel knocked loudly on her door. "Please open the door Cordy......."  
  
........................................................... .......................  
  
"How do you think he's doing?" Wesley asked April.  
  
"Mr Smooth? He's probably still talking to her door. I'm April by the way."  
  
"I'm Gunn, this is Wesley. So you knew Angel when he was a bad ass then?"  
  
"Yep." April nodded.  
  
"Got any funny stories about him?"  
  
"Well there is an amusing one about Angelus and a pissed off donkey..............."  
  
........................................................... .......................  
  
"I'm getting tired off speaking to the door Cordelia." Angel sighed. The door opened slowly revealing an unusually shy Cordelia.  
  
"Here, I bought you this." Cordelia thrust a small package into Angel's chest then walked over to the other side of the room. Angel tore off the wrapping revealing a David Gray CD. "I heard you singing it......."  
  
"Thank you Cordy." Angel said touched by her thoughtfulness.  
  
"It's nothing." She mumbled nervously as she fidgeted with the hem of her shirt.  
  
"Cordy, look at me."  
  
"I am looking at you."  
  
"No, your looking at some where above and to the left of me." Angel walked over to her slowly forcing Cordelia to back up in to the wall.  
  
"Well you obviously heard what I said out there."  
  
"I....." Cordelia nodded dumbly. "You can take it back if you want, pretend it never happened."  
  
"Why would I do that?"  
  
Cordelia shrugged mutely.  
  
"I'm not going to take it back."  
  
"Oh."  
  
........................................................... .......  
  
"You think she's staked him yet?" April said as she aimed a piece of popcorn at Wesley's mouth only for it to bounce off his glasses.  
  
"It is rather quiet. Should we check if they are ok?" The rogue demon hunter said cleaning the salt off his specs.  
  
"What if they're....you know.....bumping uglies?"  
  
"Thank you for that mental picture April." Gunn shuddered.  
  
"They can't, cursed remember." Wesley successfully threw a piece of popcorn at April. "SCORE!"  
  
........................................................... .....................  
  
"It's true you know." Angel sat down on her bed. "I'm in love with you."  
  
"Well you're gonna have to stop that." Cordelia said desperately.  
  
"We're friends Angel. Please leave it at that."  
  
"I can't Cordy, not any more. I'm in love with you."  
  
"Will you please stop saying that." Cordelia blushed.  
  
"And you're in love with me."  
  
"I'm not!"  
  
"You are! Just admit it." Angel argued stubbornly.  
  
"I can't!"  
  
"Why not?"  
  
"Because then that's the end of our friendship." Cordelia confessed quietly.  
  
"What do you mean?" Angel asked her gently.  
  
"What happens when you get bored with me Angel? We go back to being friends? I don't think so." She scoffed.  
  
"Trust me Cordy, I will never get bored with you." He tried to reassure her.  
  
"You don't know that for sure."  
  
"I do. I love you." It felt so good to finally say it.  
  
"What about Buffy?" Cordelia ventured cautiously, she didn't like bringing up the B word too much. "Buffy's dead Cordelia." Angel said as though she didn't already know.  
  
"But you two had that eternal love thing, you know, star crossed lovers, blah blah blah. How can I compete with that?"  
  
"Buffy and I were over a long time before she died Cordy. She moved on....and now it's my turn to....with the woman I love....with you." Cordelia sat next to him on the bed and tried to process everything Angel had said. She felt Angel snake his hand through hers but didn't pull away.  
  
"The odds couldn't be more against us." Cordelia rambled, "I mean, look at our track records, not exactly shiny with happy memories are they? Between Xander Harris and Buffy Summers we're both pretty messed up. Airports don't have as much baggage as us. Oh and hello? The little subject of your curse. April might fancy a few rounds with Angelus but I sure as hell don't... "  
  
"Cordy look at me." Angel interrupted her, but she continued to look every where but at him. He turned her chin towards him, "I want to be with you." He cradled her face gently in his hand. "Nothing else matters."  
  
Before she could argue he was kissing her, it was chaste and nervous, but he was kissing her. Cordelia was busy reeling from the fact that this was actually happening. Kiss him back! Her brain yelled at her but he was already moving away from her, her skin ached at the loss of his touch, she instinctively pulled him back and kissed him long and hard, the way she did in her dreams, the way she had wanted to for the last two years. They fell backwards on the bed, a tangle of arms and legs. Angel ran his hands over her hips and tugged her towards him as she slipped her hands under his shirt, delighting in the feel of his cool skin at her finger tips.  
  
CURSE! Her brain screamed at her as her hands began to drift down toward his belt. She tore herself away gasping for breath, flushed at the way she had suddenly man handled him.  
  
"Well.....we've never done that before." Cordelia smiled .  
  
"Yep, that was something new." Angel touched the bare patch of skin on her back where her shirt had ridden up, tracing the tattoo he knew was there with his finger tips making her quiver.  
  
"Angel.....I, VISION ARGH!!!" Cordelia screamed in pain, Angel caught her before she fell off the bed and held her as the vision wracked her mind and body. "Little girl....on her own.....three demons....oh God!" She sobbed in to Angels chest. "You have to hurry Angel, she's so scared." Cordelia scribbled down the address with her eyeliner on a tissue.  
  
"Will you be ok?" Angel wiped the tears off her cheeks and kissed her forehead soothingly.  
  
"I'm fine Angel, go." She reassured him. Moving quickly down the stairs Angel called out to the others in the kitchen,  
  
"Cordy's had a vision, we don't have much time."  
  
........................................................... ............  
  
"I don't think I ever seen any one do that to a Mennka demon before." Wesley said in awe of April as they walked back to Angels car.  
  
"Did you really have to do that thing with it's eye?" Gunn said feeling a little nauseous. "What? It had two more, any way its hardly gonna need them now. Angel cutting them in half put an end to any big reading plans it had." She chuckled.  
  
"Well it would have been cruel to let it go on living after what you did to it." Angel grimaced.  
  
"Hello? They were gonna hurt that little cutie. I thought this is what you guys did, saved the innocent and such."  
  
"Yeah, but that was just nasty." Gunn shuddered  
  
"God you lot are wimps." April climbed in to the back of the car. "I have no idea how Cordelia puts up with you all." At the mention of Cordelia's name Angel smiled. "Ooh look at Mr smilie pants." April teased him. "I take it you were getting some where with Cordelia before her vision struck."  
  
"Yeah you could say that.....Wes could you do me a favour in the morning?" Angel asked.  
  
"Sure." Wesley said without taking his eyes off April. She is quite captivating  
  
"Fix my damn curse."  
  
........................................................... .......................  
  
Angel knocked softly on Cordelia's door, when there was no reply he realised she must be asleep, exhausted from the vision. Even though he knew she was really ok Angel still opened the door to check on her, but to his horror she wasn't in there. Panicking that she had finally left him, even after every thing he had said Angel rushed to call her cell phone. When he stumbled in to his room his dead heart leapt at the sight before him. Cordelia was right where she belonged, curled up asleep in his bed.  
  
"Hey." She said groggily as woke up, even in her sleep she could feel when Angel was close. "Did you get there in time?"  
  
"Yeah, the girls fine, just a little shaken. How you feeling?" Angel sat down in the chair next to the bed.  
  
"A vision on top of a hang over is not fun. Sleep helped though."  
  
"I went to your room and you weren't there, I thought you'd left." Angel frowned.  
  
"I didn't. I'm still here." She reassured him. "I'm not going any where. You're stuck with me I'm afraid." Cordelia patted the space next to her and Angel laid down pulling her close and running his hands through her hair.  
  
"I think I could live with that." He murmured.  
  
"I forgot to tell you something earlier" Cordelia yawned.  
  
"Mmmm."  
  
"I love you too." She said as drifted off to sleep, feeling safe and loved in Angels arms.  
  
the end 


End file.
